‘It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it, that matters’ (Epictetus)
Over the last few weeks in assembly we’ve considered extracts from a speech commonly referred to as the ‘Make Your Bed’ speech, which is all about developing ourselves and making a positive contribution to the lives of others. On Monday, we considered how the Stoics had much to say on this matter during Greek and Roman times that arguably applies as much, if not more, to modern life.
One of the challenges young people (indeed all of us) face in the modern world is the sometimes overwhelming amount of information to which we’re exposed due to the all-encompassing nature of social media and the 24-hour news cycle. It can also feel that there is very little we can do about most of the problems the news cycle seems to amplify. On top of that, we all have things that bother us in our own lives, some of which we share with others, some of which we don’t.
The ancient Greek and Roman philosophy of Stoicism, which was a major philosophical force for over six hundred years from 300 BC to the third-century AD, offers a practical way of navigating such difficulties and uncertainties in today’s world.
The central premise at the heart of Stoicism is a question: what level of control do you have in any given situation? This applies to everything, from the biggest global challenges to the minor frustrations of everyday life. The Roman Stoic Epictetus explained more in his handbook, written in 125 AD:
‘Within our power are opinion, motivation, desire, aversion and, in a word, whatever is of our own doing; not within our power are our body, our property, reputation, office and, in a word, whatever is not of our own doing.’
In other words, what we control is up to us; what we don’t control, isn’t. When stuck in a traffic jam, Stoics would not allow themselves to get frustrated or angry – that would be a waste of energy with no benefit. A Stoic would remain calm, detached and focus on what they can control. In school, someone with a stoical mindset would focus on what they can learn from not getting the mark they want in an exam, rather than being upset about failing; nor would they over celebrate winning a sporting fixture, or blame the ref or their team-mates when they lose.
They would also rise above the temptation to repay an unpleasant comment or gossip in kind – Epictetus warned that other people’s views and troubles can be contagious and to avoid negativity in response to the unkindness of others. In the ancient world the threat posed from others sometimes came from angry mobs prone to rioting; today, that role is often taken by social media pile-ons. The Stoics would advise steering well clear of both.
Maintaining positive relationships with others is very much in our power. Marcus Aurelius, the Roman emperor and Stoic philosopher wrote in his diary, ‘When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: the people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly. They are like this because they can’t tell good from evil.’ Then he told himself, ‘We were born to work together like feet, hands and eyes, like the two rows of teeth, upper and lower. To obstruct each other is unnatural. To feel anger at someone, to turn your back on him: these are unnatural.’ Put simply, other people might sometimes be annoying and while we cannot control that, we always have the freedom to choose how you feel and react to them.’
Being stoical has perhaps been seen more negatively in recent times, linked to the idea of maintaining a stiff upper lip or keeping our emotions to ourselves in a world where the benefits of talking about how we feel are widely accepted.
It does, however, remind us that – as with almost anything – we can train ourselves to get better at managing the ups and downs we all experience in life. There are many examples of how practising Stoicism can help in the context of everyday life and perhaps the last word should go to Seneca, a Roman statesman and Stoic philosopher who lived in the 1st Century AD, whose commentary on how to deal with problems:
‘Seize your adversities head on. To bear trials with a calm mind robs misfortune of its strength and burden. Complain little: no condition is so bitter that a stable mind cannot find some consolation in it. Think your way through difficulties: harsh conditions weigh less on those who know how to bear them.’
I recommended this book to our students – it considers how the principles of Stoicism can be used in modern-day life. There are, of course, many others on this important topic, which perhaps further underlines the enduring benefits of Stoicism.
Have a great weekend
Best wishes
Michael Bond
